Ask not tell…

If anyone tells you to do anything you want to resist.  Recently some-one told me to do something and I was in a volunteering capacity and I was incredibly resistant.  Asking for help and support always gets a better response.

A potential Client was explaining a team member’s response to attending a team meeting.  The employee had called a colleague and said they would not bother coming back to the office to come to the weekly meeting.  The Manager was obviously irritated and asked the colleague to phone them straight back and tell them they had to attend.

I asked why as the Manager they had not made the call.  They could have asked

“Why do you think that your attendance at the meeting would not add value?”

The brain always has to answer a question, and questioning the value they would bring to a meeting is far harder to excuse yourself.

Ask not tell leadership style is much more empowering.  Whenever a team member comes to you with a problem the best approach is to always ask them what they would do first rather than offer out a solution.

Another example is a request for holiday during a busy period, instead of an immediate no, ask how they think the company will survive with their absence.  Asking is all about pushing responsibility and getting the brain to work for itself.

Telling some-one not to be late, will make the serial offender repeat their actions.  Asking them what they think they can do to ensure they are on time, makes them do the thinking.

Ask not tell is more empowering to you as leader and to the recipient.

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