Are we OK…?

I recommend everyone in a team or working with organisations to listen to Brené Brown’s latest episode of Dare to Lead, her guests are Simon Sinek and Adam Grant.

My summary and my own thoughts about the podcast will resonate with so many of you. The opening question is what are you seeing in organisations? and the response is resistance to hybrid working and remote working. People are still burnt out or to use Adam Grant’s language some are still languishing. It is the “Great Awkward” everyone is now in the business of managing chaos.

People are struggling to regulate emotions and there is a need from Leadership to normalise it. It is OK to not be OK. Vulnerability is greatness and we are all uncertain about this new world of work. We need to find some calm within the chaos and good leadership is about recognising it and not under estimating it.

The three of them have a very much US focus so a lot of emphasis on the “Big Resignation” whilst here in the UK we are now dealing with the “Silent Resignation”. The cost of living crisis means we will stay but we will work to rule and we are not OK.

There are also people that thrived since Covid a re-evaluation of their life led them to make new decisions. They have certainty to do something else but anxiety as to what next…! Often these two opposing feelings can give you “I’m OK but not joyful”.

We are all grieving an existence that we can’t go back to and yet it is this feeling of ambiguity, that uncertainty as to whether it was better?

The leadership solution is to have the uncomfortable conversations and hold space for some-one to talk, not to solve. “ Hold space not fix”

It is not OK to post on social media that you are not OK this communicating out, but connecting in that awkward conversation to say you are struggling. This exposure of your vulnerability takes a risk as to whether the person will connect with you, and the rejection could be devastating but worth risking than just posting with no hope of human connection.

Our partnerships/marriages have been under the same burden, we are not looking for our partner to solve anything we are looking for them to acknowledge us. Opening up to each will bring us closer.

Relationships in and outside work take constant maintenance. Communicating via text is not connecting, I speak to my kids at University as I want to hear the awkwardness in their voices or the joy. Relationships are hard work and continuous.

We are in the business of human skills not Hard or Soft as organisations like to label them. If you invest in development of human skills you get the behaviour you reward.

To create a culture of givers rather than takers we need to acknowledge them as a group not as individuals. They need to be involved in meaningful work and the organisation also need to provide the environment where they can thrive.

Toxic cultures are where abuse and unethical behaviours are rife and trust is badly broken. This is where you see a High Performer thrive with no-one trusting them. This individual is dangerous and will increase the toxicity. This person needs help and the first question is are they coachable? In essence they are “Not a High Performer if they don’t make people feel better”.

Organisations now have to believe they are in service not individualism. Service to each other as to what is best as a group to maintain a healthy culture. NASA has the mantra the most meaningful way to succeed is to help others to succeed. Show up for each other. Talking to people about the value of people not about people. When presenting, speaking or even in meetings we are in service to be generous. Data now needs to be collated on what a high performing team looks like rather than individuals.

I cannot recommend the episode highly enough, my three favourite writers in the same place, and saying all that I am feeling and seeing.

https://brenebrown.com/podcast/whats-happening-at-work-part-1-of-2/